Journey to the 40's and Beyond

one womans quest to stay sane and deal with being 40

Will we survive another Christmas?

December 19th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

Yep, it’s the mad time of year again.

A whirlwind of end of year functions, music concerts, sports breakups, Christmas parties with friends, family dinners, cards to write, must put the tree up on 1st December, Kris Kringle shopping, just shopping shopping shopping, busy time at work…..and on it goes.

Very hard to keep track of everything I have to do. Very hard to keep everyone happy – impossible really.

This year, in order to avoid the traditional Christmas family conflicts, we have decided to travel to Europe and totally get away from our normal dramas. I really hope this works!!

So far, we have reduced the amount of functions considerably, and have cut our gift list drastically. We have decided on to give gifts to people we see regularly and who are an important part of our daily lives. This may sound harsh, but too bad! Life is too short!

So in 48 hours from now, I will preparing to board a plane to the other side of the world, thinking about that relaxing glass of champagne I will drink once safely in the air, and will be looking forward to a lovely while, and hopefully stress free, Christmas.

If this actually works, I think I may just have to be away somewhere exploring our amazingly diverse planet every year at Christmas. Sound Good? Try it!!

Merry Christmas to my few readers….. Ho Ho Ho!

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Procrastination

November 21st, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

Procrastination 

Dictionary meaning – verb – put off doing something.

I am becoming the Queen of Procrastination this week.

I have to write reports for my students – a job I am fast learning to dislike intensely. Reducing six months of learning and achievement to 400words and a few dots on the Progression Points checklist – YUK!

So far to put off the inevitable I have:

  • washed dishes
  • changed bed sheets
  • phoned a friend (or two)
  • decided to go out with my husband tonight, researched current movies and booked a babysitter,
  • been to the local shops for the paper, a tatts ticket and a coffee
  • sorted out my teenage sons dirty washing (really grasping here)
  • moderated comments on my student’s blogs
  • and now I am writing this post.

Quite a productive morning, don’t you think?

Oh well, the deadline is looming, and I really can’t put it off any longer.

Time to make a coffee, put on another load of washing, feed the guinea pigs….. I really must write today!!

Parenting Psychology

November 19th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

When your children are upset or unhappy – doesn’t it break your heart?

You have to juggle smothering and mothering, protecting and letting them learn from experience, even when it hurts them sometimes.

I have a little man ( and he really is a little man ) who just wants to be friends with everyone. At the tender age of almost 8 he finds himself caught in the middle of a tricky situation. His friends don’t like each other, and they are trying to convince him to choose between them. Difficult for an adult to handle, catastrophic for a child.

Having no idea how to handle this, or even really understand what is going on, he is just really upset and this is coming out in bad behaviour. The poor little mite.

Lucky for him, he has a brilliant and caring teacher who will work with us to guide him through this little crossroads. I know he will become a better and stronger person for the experience. It just seems so hard for a little bloke to have to deal with this at such a young age.

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Travel Plans

November 17th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

So Much To Do!

What I love about being 40 is that I get to have a mid-life crisis!

Mine is taking the form of travel – until July this year I had never travelled outside Australia before. I have been building up to it over the past couple of years, and this year we did it! And, we’re doing it again! Lucky Me!!

Why travel? Why not! Seriously, I do feel like there is a whole world out there that is waiting to be explored. I know it’s been done by so many, but watching Getaway episodes just isn’t the same. I guess I feel like I want to put myself out of my comfort zone and have some adventures. And to add to the adventure I am dragging my husband and three kids along with me!

After travelling to Malaysia in July and having some terrific experiences, we have decided to get out of the country for Christmas. So we are heading off to Europe for 4 weeks of visiting family, skiing in Austria and generally travelling around doing the tourist/packpacker thing. Yep – no buses or pre-booked travel for us. We are catching Eurail, backpacking and staying in hostels with three kids. In winter.

While I can’t wait for our next adventure to begin, I am mindful of all the little details that have to be organised before we leave (32 days and counting). Animals to sort out, house sitter to book, currency to exchange, making sure we leave enough money behind to pay for bills, mortgage etc, Christmas shopping to be done (for others), Christmas and end of year work functions to attend, and the list goes on.

However, I do feel I am getting better at this. I have not used a travel agent, but have my trusty Lonely Planet book to guide me. Although it has taken countless internet hours, I have booked all tickets and accommodation – I am so proud of myself. Now all I need is to pack, finish all those little jobs on my list, board the plane and let the adventure begin … wish me luck!!

I wonder how long it will be before I can justify my next mid-life crisis? Maybe I will have to write a travel book for 40 YO women and their families to use.

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What does the word “Mum” mean?

November 14th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

When I spend a night like last night, looking after a sick child, I remember all the things that the word Mum means.

Carer, nurterer, disposer of vomit, cleaner, comforter – these are a few.

When my kids are sick, I am somehow able to find reserves of patience and strength that I don’t usually display in my everyday life. I can cope with lack of sleep, I can deal with vomit buckets that have to be emptied and sheets that need washing. I think this is the time that unconditional love is demonstrated. Simply put, my child needed me, and his needs were greater than mine.  This is the time that I feel bad about being grumpy, nagging for the dishwasher to be emptied by anyone but me, and most of all, this is the time I am thankful that the worst I have to deal with is the occasional bucket of spew and a few wet sheets.

How women in circumstances worse than mine cope I do not know. As trite as it sounds, this thought does actually help me deal with my problems. For they are indeed pretty minor.

Keep that thought in your head the next time you empty the vomit bucket – I bet you will agree with me.

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New Toys

November 11th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

Gotta love retail therapy!

I have been a very naughty girl this week… I have indulged in some retail therapy that I have found many ways to justify to myself. I haven’t justified to my husband yet as he hasn’t come home from work to find out! OOOPS

Purchase 1 – I have upgraded my mobile phone to one of those fancy touch screen things. Not an iphone, but close. Will I use all the features – I doubt it. Will I ever work out how to answer a call without cutting people off? I hope so!

Why? Well, my old phone was plain annoying. It had a mind of it’s own – and that is just not to be tolerated in a device that is supposed to make my life easier. Also, the new one is pink – my favourite colour. It’s not even costing me much -  a mere $12 per week plus calls etc. Oh well – that’s almost a necessity, isn’t it?

Purchase 2 – a new whizz bang blender for making smoothies! With this magic little purchase I have reinstated my position with the children as #1 parent. We have just spent a happy afternoon on a hot, hot day making a range of delicious and “random” concoctions. My daughter even named them – Red Planet, Sky smoothie, Marshmallow Madness and Mellow Yellow. Fantastic names, and they tasted really good. Quite nutritious too, well…maybe not the Marshmallow Madness. So good in fact that I think I need to share one of the recipes with you.

Mellow Yellow: 2 Bananas, Flesh of 1 mango, a slice of pineapple cut into chunks, 2 cups orange juice and a handful of ice cubes. Blend all together until smooth – Fabulous!

Now, when my husband finds this little gem in our fridge waiting for him, surely he won’t be cross. We’ll soon find out

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Contact!

November 10th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

Well – It appears that my humble blog is being viewed by someone out there!

That is a surprise!

Whoever you are…don’t be shy, leave me a comment. Do you love it / hate it / don’t really care? Start a dialogue – it’s painless!

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Girl Power!!

November 8th, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

I have a group of girlfriends that I am very close to. We are all within five years of age (roughly) of each other. 

We support each other.

We have an understanding of each other that our husbands do not have of us. I don’t really know why. Maybe it’s the Venus and Mars thing? What ever the reason, I feel incredibly priveleged to be a part of these women’s lives, and to have had them in mine for the last 10 or so years.

My inspiration for this week’s post comes from one of my activities this weekend. The setting: 5 women (all wearing thongs – the foot variety), hammers, screw drivers, stanley knives, old carpet, breathing masks, and a skip.

We crawled around on the floor, ripping up old carpet to reveal the parquetry flooring beneath. Removing staples, trim and nails. A glass of red, some easy chatter, lots of laughter.  Why get a tradesman when the girls can do it instead?

This is just one of the many things us girls have been through together. We don’t solve the big problems of the world, but we do help each other however we can, and this makes all of our lives richer. I know I couldn’t have survived many of life’s little bumps in the road without them.

For example, we have been through pregnancies, separations, toddler tantrums, sleepless nights and breast feeding, kinder, depression, financial troubles, birthdays, funerals, illnesses, Christmasses, moving houses, career changes, study, anything and everything.

Girls, I can’t adequately express how much you continue to mean to me. Thanks.

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Fun Family Weekends! Or are they?

November 3rd, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

Quality family time is something that is not only bandied about as an ideal for busy families, but is also in reality pretty important for the growth and development of family relationships.

The only problem? Sometimes it’s really difficult to make that quality time really good quality.

I am writing this at the end of a four day weekend with my busy family of five. Our engagements for the weekend included :

  • drive teenager to party
  • do grocery shopping and washing for whole family
  • try to get kids to help with housework
  • go to party / BBQ with rest of family
  • pick up teenager
  • husband help friend move house
  • set up class blogs for my grade & new blog for me
  • pay bills
  • clean up the garden (huge job…can’t be put off any longer)
  • try to get kids to help with garden – they didn’t even want to look after the fire!
  • entertain and feed extra child
  • do all correction and planning for next week of work
  • teach daughter how to do embroidery for guides project
  • cook in preparation for picnic (that’s the quality time!)
  • organise others to meet at picnic – kids don’t want to go with only us!
  • GO TO PICNIC -Yea! finally got there!
  • etc etc etc etc

Are you exhausted? I am! My husband also added to this list with his own jobs around the house.

What was I writing about? Oh yes, quality family time…. only the kids really only wanted to go with others and didn’t even talk to us much unless it was to ask for food.

How hard can it be? Is that really quality time? Do you have to force your children to spend time with you by taking them without others?  I don’t know! I do know that it shouldn’t have to be this hard, however I suspect that this is just the beginning.

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What does that mean?

November 1st, 2009 by · No Comments · Uncategorized

A weird title for a blog? Maybe, but this is what I am interested in writing about at this time in my life.

As you may have guessed, I have just entered my 41st year, and am facing many new challenges in my life. Some of them are professional, some related to parenting and raising a family, some purely personal.

I am also the kind of annoying person who gets bored easily, and I constantly set myself goals and challenges….unfortunately I don’t always follow through with them.

One of my goals in writing this blog, is to keep myself honest about my goals and challenges, and use my blog as a kind of journal that will document my journey – both physical and spiritual. I am not particularly religious, but I do think that we all have a spirit to be nutured and I am hoping this might be one way of nurturing mine.

It may be quite diffcult to put my heart and soul out there for the world to see…I wonder how many will actually see it? That’s something I will try not to think about.

So, I think I will set up pages for my personal goals and challenges, and if you are interested read on.

If nothing else, this will make me write, think, plan, read, and maybe even complete some of my challenges!

Welcome along for the ride!

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